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Don’t bend your knee

Self-esteem

When I was 13 I remember standing in front of the mirror in my downstairs toilet with a friend. We were trying out the new blue mascara we’d bought (yes, it was a thing!) and she looked at me in the mirror and said ‘You’ve got really veiny eyelids.’ I remember it as clear as day. I suddenly became very conscious of my eyes and, every day since, I’ve covered them with concealer believing that they must look horrible and abnormal without it.

The things people say to us, and about us, can stick, can’t they? They become something we believe about ourselves, and form part of our identity. I remember someone calling me the BFG once (that’s the Big Friendly Giant, for those of you who haven’t seen the film). From then on I imagined that people must think I was abnormally tall, I felt like I stood out, and I didn’t want to. I wanted to blend in. I started to slightly bend my left knee whenever I stood in a group of people to seem shorter.

I recently made a conscious decision to stop covering my eyes with concealer every day. I felt nervous about going out without make-up on, but it was surprisingly freeing. According to my sister I didn’t look any different, all these years I’ve been embarrassed and it turns out they’re just normal eyelids! NOTE TO THE WORLD: ALL EYELIDS HAVE VEINS ON.

Are there parts of your body you’re ashamed of? Are there things that people have said that have made you dislike yourself? Here’s the truth – you’re beautiful. Completely and utterly breathtakingly beautiful. It may be a truth that’s hard for you to grasp and believe, but that doesn’t make it untrue. Beauty comes in a million forms, but unfortunately we’re led to believe by the images we see around us that in order to be classed as ‘beautiful’ we need to fit into a certain mould. It leads us to feel that we’re a project to be worked on, constantly needing to be improved.

Today I want you to think about the way you see yourself, are you battling against yourself? Like me, are you bending your knee, hiding away? Today, consciously decide to stand up tall and allow the real you to rise up and come out into the open.

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